My heart aches for those that will face the loss of loved one, Mothers, Fathers, Uncles, Brothers, Sisters, Aunts. Young children in despair over the unknown fate of their loved one.

The hero's that are searching for survivors, those that have battled fire, smoke and dangerous falling debris.

A country astounded that they have been victimized by terrorists that would seek to demoralize a freedom of a nation. Let your heart be filled with caring and love, not the anger and revenge that could be directed to a people that are unknown. Do what your heart tells you will heal a nation.

Subject: A Message from Chaplain Bruce Cook

Last night a group of homicide surviving family members and I held a prayer vigil for families victimized by the terrorist attack at the Vinings United Methodist Church in Atlanta. Here are some suggested helps that may aid a person in this crisis:

The Crime Victims Advocacy Council in Atlanta, GA has been counseling crime victims since 1989. It is an endorsed ministry of the North Georgia Conference and is supported by local church and Conference funds. The Council reports the following information which may be helpful to members of congregations that are feeling varying degrees of stress and fear and anger over the recent terrorist attacks:

Be aware that you have experienced a heinous crime and are secondarily victimized by it. It did not directly happen to you, but indirectly and vicariously you felt the horror of it.

Be aware that it is common for you to feel shock, numb, confused, mesmerized by TV coverage of the event, angry, depressed, unable to work (dysfunctional and unfocused at work).

Be aware that you may experience "stress reactions' and unable to sleep; or want to sleep to much; unable to eat; or eat too much to fill a nervous stomach; may be hypervigilant; or hyperaroused and in an agitated state.

Be aware that you may feel fearful of being attacked again in your town and may feel unusually vulnerable now that personal safety has been breached by terrorists in a massive scale that was unimaginable until now.

Be aware of the need to talk to friends, family, neighbors, clergy, to "make sense" out of a senseless act of terror. You may be obsessed with finding out details to explain the event and the unexplainable.

Be aware that this event may shake or strengthen your personal faith in God. The "Why" and "How" question will be asked of God and will depend on
your theology for your answer. Remember "the basics" that God wills love, good, shalom, and obedience to Him. Humanity disobeys God's will by choosing to be hateful and unloving and evil, which often causes pain and destruction.

Be aware of your faith community and the sacred space and caring spiritual leaders it offers for you to go and pray and work toward your healing during this national crisis.

Be aware of your need to take some action to help and be reasonable in doing so. Donating money, giving blood, volunteering to help can be good and bad, reasonable and unreasonable. Check to see if your help is needed and wanted before providing it or you may be more in the way than helpful.

Read about PTSD on the web, ncjrs.org and click on victims. See if you are experiencing any symptoms. Some may see this horrible terrorism on TV and this may cause a "flashing back" to WWII or Vietnam or a previous violent crime victimization. Take the free 45 question Coping Skills Inventory Test on the website of queendom.com to see how you score on your coping ability to handle stress. You will gain insight into your present coping ability. Work on weak areas identified by the test.
For information on CVAC
see gbgm-umc.org/cvac.
Contact Person: Chaplain Bruce Cook,
770.333.9254 (24hr. Hotline)

"I can't fix it, but I hope to be an emotional compass in rough waters." - Dr. Phil

All over the world, people are struggling with emotions after the events of September 11, 2001. Dr. Phil McGraw offers advice for coping:

No "Right" Way to React
People respond to tragedy in different ways. Some people might be visibly shaken, while others are stoic. If you're a caring, feeling person, it's normal and natural to feel "off" or undone-just as it's normal to move on with your daily chores and duties. The important thing to remember is that there is no right or wrong way to react.

Psychological and Physical Effects
The intent of terrorism goes beyond destruction. On a larger psychological level, the idea is to disrupt our day-to-day lives. Terrorists aim to disturb how we live, to frighten us and to challenge what we think about our world.

Our personal challenge is to not give in to any of that. Keep being who you are and doing what you normally do. Don't let these attacks allow you to become overly reclusive or paranoid. Each and every one of us is fighting a battle of wills. We have to say, "I will not succumb." It isn't easy to work through these difficult feelings. You don't have to like it, you just have to do it.

Three Steps to Begin Healing
1. Give yourself permission to own your feelings. Feel whatever you're feeling, and be where you are.
2. Manage those feelings. You always have a choice: you can withdraw from life, or you can face your feelings and work with them. If you decide to withdraw, you'll miss out on the vibrancy of life. Choose to work through your emotions, and you'll be stronger for it.
3. Find meaning in the process of healing.
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1. Give yourself permission to grieve. Whatever you may be feeling, it's okay. Don't fight your emotions; work through them. If you don't, you'll have unfinished emotional business.
2. Don't think that your life is insignificant. Acknowledge that your life is important.
3. If you want to heal, give. When you need comfort and strength, give it to others. By helping other people, you can begin to heal.
4. Give your feelings a voice. Talking about your emotions can help you work through them.
5. Maintain your normal routine. Take each day at a time. Even if you don't feel like doing your regular activities, do so anyway. Behave your way to recovery.
6. Don't make life-changing decisions. Now is not the time to make major life decisions. Instead, use this time to evaluate what is important to you. Be patient with yourself during this emotional time. 7. Don't be in denial. This has been a negative event that has changed all of us. While you shouldn't be paranoid, you should be alert and aware of your safety.

From the show Dr. Phil Helps Grieving Americans, Part 2

Managing Anger and Frustration
Shock Transforms to Anger
How many times did you hear people say, "This can't be happening?" That's because one of the first reactions to a tragedy is shock. It's a normal reaction. After shock often comes anger, which is a big part of the emotional process.

Passionate outrage can be empowering. Wanting justice and accountability for these horrific terrorist attacks is both justifiable and rational. It can lift us to action. However, there's a point where this anger becomes toxic by causing bitterness and closed-mindedness. If anger causes you to behave irrationally-for example, harboring ill will toward Arabs or Arab-Americans-that is wrong.

It's imperative to work through your anger. Until you identify why you're angry, you won't be able to work through it. Anger is merely a manifestation of one (or more) of three deep emotions: Hurt Fear Frustration

Moving Past Anger
Releasing negative energy will allow you to feel better. Channel this energy into positive situations. Become active in your community, be a role model for your children or voice your opinion to representatives in Washington-just do something positive with this negative energy.
From the show Dr. Phil Helps Grieving Americans, Part 2