Mary had a little Lamb, little lamb, little lamb, Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow.
Everywhere that Mary went, Mary went, Mary went, everywhere that Mary went, the lamb was sure to go.

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To be admired is one of the greatest gifts of love. In the nursery rhyme Mary is admired by the lamb. If Mary did not love the lamb so, it would not follow her.

A child loves a parent in this way, they ache for the attention because they know they are loved.

When a parent dies, the Little Lamb is lost and confused. They are not sure if the love is gone or just missing for a while until they behave. No one can replace the admired parent and the child stays lost for a very long time. No amount of reassurance helps, because the child can not comprehend at an early age. As they mature the feelings of the initial loss become entwined in their understanding. The parent becomes a myth and the love they remember is steeped in mystery.

How can we help these little lambs? To help them remember is almost painful, because they must remember the Human person, not the person they have created.

At each new coming of age, it is good to take out the photos, stories and other saved items and retell the story of the person's life. Leave room for questions, and lovingly correct the child's memory without discounting the love that remains. Your child will be interested when the time is right, and will be eager to remember.

Do not be afraid to laugh, cry and even show your own grief. The child will accept what his maturity will allow, and if you reassure them it's OK to have these feelings you may find you are the one now admired.